Sometimes I think that I am the last person on the planet that reads the daily comics. I know I can’t be. They would not continue to publish them just for me. Others must indulge. Who are they? Are any under 65? Do they actually laugh at what they read, or, like me, are they just hoping that once in a blue moon something mildly amusing will pop up?
I am not talking about the Sunday Comics. Everyone reads them. Who can resist the large format, the bright colors, the extra offerings. They are irresistible. If every day had comics like those, newspaper circulation would zoom once again. Alas, it’s not to be.
I cannot remember a time when I did not devour the daily funnies. They have been a part of my day ever since I started reading. Through the Bethlehem Morning Call, the South Carolina State, the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette and now the Philadelphia Inquirer I have faithfully turned to the “Funny Pages” to see the cartoon antics.
My devotion to comics is such that for many years I considered papers without a funnies page as inferior. What was the point of the New York Times or Wall Street Journal if they didn’t feature Hagar the Horrible or Funky Winkerbean. At the very least the Times should’ve carried Doonesbury and the Journal Dilbert. Then I might have read them!!!


The comics differ from paper to paper. No matter, I have read them all. Whether they were masterpieces, like Calvin and Hobbes and The Far Side, mediocrities relying on the same joke over and over, like Beatle Bailey and Pickles, or just plain bad, like The Lockhorns and Ziggy, I persevered.



I am proud to say that I never stooped so low as to follow the serials, such as Brenda Starr or Prince Valiant. Even when I could figure out the never-ending storylines, these pseudo-serious sagas were so silly I could not stick with them. I do have standards. They may be low, but they exist.


The comics I get in the Inquirer are your usual mixed bag. Get Fuzzy and Pearls Before Swine are modern classics. Blondie and Baby Blues are stalwarts you can count on. Pardon My Planet and Jump Start try and be contemporary, don’t quite make it, but are still worth reading. Then there are the just plain inexplicable.



Take Crabgrass, please (thank you Henny). For the last month this comic about two neighbor boys has been pursuing an arc where one kid launches himself into another dimension, plopping his doppelganger into ours. Characters come and go. The dimensions flip flop for no discernable reason. It is neither interesting nor funny. There is no reason to read it, and yet I do. (A trial has just started. Not sure why).

Heart of the City began as a cute cartoon about a little girl with overblown dreams of stardom. Then it jumped to Junior High and the plots (I use the term loosely) became banal and moralistic. Even worse, the renderings are so badly drawn, it is often hard to tell one kid from another. Still, it is part of my daily routine.

Standing above them all is Peanuts. My father would bring me a collection of Charles Schultz’s tour de force whenever he went on a business trip. If he had gone to Paris (he didn’t) he probably would have searched the book stalls along the Seine for the antics of Snoopy and Linus to bring home. I still have over 20 of these compilations, almost all from his travels.

I am not sure what makes Peanuts so enduring. The humor is light, never biting. The ensemble fulfills their assigned roles. There are few surprises. Lucy will pull the ball out from Charlie Brown every time. Peppermint Patty will fall asleep at her desk every day. In many ways, it is the soft jazz of strips.


And yet it works. Schultz marries the uncertainties of childhood with those that carry over as we get older. He gives play to the fantasy world we indulge in (fighting the Red Barron, being a star baseball player), yet grounds it in the reality that never lives up to those fantasies.
The Peanuts world can be harsh. Charlie Brown will never speak with the little red-haired girl. Lucy will never get Schroeder to pay attention to her. The Great Pumpkin will never appear for Linus. But harsh as the world may be, it is never nasty. The kids bounce back to try again and again. Schultz presents it all with a gentility that is endearing.



I hadn’t intended to deal so much with Peanuts, but that strip is the essence of the comics. Like all funnies, it is comfort food. As bland as the cartoons can be, they satisfy. To push a metaphor way too far, they are the meatloaf and mashed potatoes of reading consumption. Some have hot sauce that enhances the flavor. Others pour on Ketchup to seem colorful. Many lack even gravy to liven them up. Even those, however, I gratefully gobble.
I have no doubt that as I lie on my deathbed, hopefully many years from now, I will call my nurse over to request that she read that day’s Hagar the Horrible or Sherman’s Lagoon. While my beath may be short, I will still chuckle, even if it’s a joke I have heard a thousand times. And I will drift off into the netherworld with a smile on my face.